Directions to our office
located on 6th and Locust St.
The Center for Growth, Inc.
also known as
Sex Therapy in Philadelphia
233 S. 6th Street, Suite C-33
Philadelphia PA 19106
New Clients (267) 324 - 9564
Existing Clients (215) 922-5683
Fax (215) 922-6302
Tantric Sex: what is it and what can it do for you?
Tantric Sex in Center City, Philawritten by : Jennifer Foust, Ph.D., M.S., LPC
Tantric Sex: what is it and what can it do for you? Many people have heard of tantric sex and are intrigued by it, but really have no concept of how to put it into their sex lives. Well, the funny thing is that people are already doing some of the principles but don’t even know it. For example, have you ever had sex where it just felt well…off? The kind of sex where you were obviously working against each other so you changed your position or stopped momentarily and then all of a sudden with that change the stars seem to align and you have this mind blowing sexual experience? Well, when that change aligns the stars you have just experienced one of the concepts in tantric sex: being in tune with your partner. So by now you might be asking…. In tune with my partner? What does that mean? How can I do that? Well I don’t want to put the cart before the horse, so I will wait to answer that.
First, we have to start with the basics: what is tantric sex? Well one translation is “tools for expansion”. Another is “to manifest”. Tantra has been around for over 6000 years but we are just really starting to realize its benefits here in the west. Tantra was an answer to religion that at the time, made sex a bad thing that was only meant for procreation and nothing else. Tantra created a way to get in tune with not only yourself but with your partner as well. There’s that phrase again “getting in tune”. What does that mean? It basically boils down to getting on the same energy level as your partner. OK, so how do you do that??
The important thing to remember here is that most people regard sex like a movie, where we have the beginning of the movie, (getting aroused), the middle, (penetration), and the end (the orgasm). Well with Tantric sex there is no end and there may be no middle. You may be thinking: Sex without penetration?? Without orgasm?? Why am I bothering?? Stick with me here I guarantee once you have mastered this you will be glad you did. Tantric sex is about the journey and that’s it.
First, you have to prepare for this journey. Prep your room by burning sage to get rid of any negative energy in the space. Then put in some fresh flowers or a mutually pleasing scent. Now, this doesn’t mean spray Old Spice or your favorite perfume over everything because your partner said they liked it once. Use light scents as scent is very important for relaxation and for the flow of energy. Find a way to relax first, whether it’s just sitting in a room with candles enjoying a glass of wine together or listening to soft music. The important thing here is to start to get in tune with each other. Keep eye contact with your partner as much as possible. This may feel weird at first but it will get easier. You may even want to take a bath with each other, taking the time to slowly bath each other. Again, do this with as much eye contact as possible. It’s important to remember though that this is not about sex. It is about connecting to your partner, so purposely avoid the genitals for now.
Now it’s time to head to your room that you have prepped. Again, this isn’t about sex in the traditional way. Don’t look for or expect the beginning, the middle, and the end. Start with a massage (it doesn’t matter who gives and who receives. Again, it’s about the journey). Remember though that this isn’t a deep tissue massage. This is just about getting in tune with your partner. You can also do a lingam or a yoni massage (that will have to be another tip for another day). It is important too that the massage also does not have a traditional beginning, middle, and end. When your partner feels like it is time to end the massage, then you can move on. During all of these steps, I want you to have as much eye contact as possible and think about your breathing. Try to match each other’s breathing, then after a while alternate your breathing. When your partner exhales, inhale picturing their energy as a mist that is in your favorite color that you breathe into you.
Since we aren’t expecting a middle or end this could be the end of it for now but I want to share with you a great technique if you move on to the middle step. Once you have penetration , either have your partner sit facing you or have him or her on top. At this point, I want you to just sit inside of each other. Do not break eye contact during this whole exercise and again link your breathing alternating with matching breathing for a while then doing the inhale exhale technique from earlier. Do this without moving for a minimum of 10 minutes. Now, by don’t move I don’t mean your arms etc. You can stroke his or her hair or face or kiss, just don’t move inside of each other. Guys, during this exercise there may be an end and it may come early. Remember this is going to be a whole new sensation for you and its OK! Partners, it is important that you make it ok also as again, THIS IS NOT ABOUT the end of the movie. Believe me, as time goes on this will increase your staying power so you will both benefit in the long run.
Well that is just a taste of what tantric sex is and there is lots out there to learn so have fun with it. Just remember there are no expectations.
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May benefit from our services:
individual counseling, couples counseling, couples therapy, marriage counseling, marriage therapy, family therapy, family counseling, sex therapy, grief therapy, anger management therapy, addiction counseling, couples workshops, enrichment seminars, support groups, skills building classes, classes.. Mental health therapists may be marriage and family therapists, social workers, psychologists, psychiatrists, counseling practitioners just to name a few. If you have enjoyed our self help tips, please let us know.You do not need to ever need to meet us to benefit from our collective years of wisdom in this field. Many of our ideas are written down in the form of self help tips that are free to be read by anyone on the Internet. If we are good, eventually we will have worked ourselves out of a job and you will be able to live the life you have always wanted!
Tantric Sex Tips
Getting in tune with your body - tantra style
Seduction Tips
Putting Passion Back into your Relationship
Bringing romance back into your relationship
Mindful Sex: A Guide to Becoming Sexually Present
Sexual Self Esteem
Confidence Boost: Try a Mantra
Helping women regain equality in their relationship
Sex Drive Topics
Putting Passion Back into your Relationship
Communication
Communication Skills CS
Sexual Communication SCS
Improving Sexual Performance
How to use touch to get the most out of sex, (Touch)
Founder of Sex Therapy
in Philadelphia
"Alex" Caroline Robboy, CAS,
ACSW, LCSW
To schedule an appointment, please call: 267 - 324 - 9564
If you live in Center City Philadelphia and the surrounding regions, including the Main Line, Montgomery County, Bucks County, Chestery County, Cherry Hill and Southern New Jersey area and want to schedule an appointment for individual therapy, couples therapy, marriage counseling, sex therapy, family therapy or play therapy call (267) 324-9564.
